Wait and Don’t…or Do and Wait

Waiting is not my forte. Is it because I wait so much that it irritates me so to wait? Or is it the fact that I still need to learn to wait that I keep waiting?

What exactly am I waiting for?

It could be genius. Yes, that’s it-

Or maybe a miracle…

Perhaps a breakthrough.

Is it possible that God is waiting on me?

John 2: 1-11: The first Miracle.

What was the purpose of the first miracle? There was a wedding feast and they were out of wine.

How did Jesus get involved? His mother told him they were out of wine.  When he told her his time had not yet come, she turned to the servants and said “whatever he says, do it.”

If it wasn’t his time yet, why did Jesus get involved? They needed Him.

Did Jesus just magically turn water into wine? No, first he told the servants to fill the jugs with water.  Then, he told them to take a serving to the master of the feast.  When the master took a drink, it was wine. Nobody was aware that it had been water, “but the servants who had drawn water knew” (v. 9).

The miracle here is not so much that Jesus turned water into wine.  It was the fact that the servants obeyed him. What would have happened to them if they would have brought the master of the feast water?  They would have been shamed, fired, stoned, or fed to the gators.  Who knows?  But for some reason, they obeyed Jesus.  When they did, they exercised their faith.  They did not wait for him to perform a miracle, they just did what he said and the miracle followed! He was glorified in their actions!

Ah, to be filled to the brim with Christ.

To seek him in our calling-humbling ourselves to be Holy in order to fulfill the things for which we are chosen.

No need to fear why or how.  When he speaks, obey.

Every time.

The miracles come with obedience.

Lord, this is me. Here and now. Right now, presently,  I seek to find you.  I seek to know what I do not know. I’ll wait for your instructions, yet will continue to be a servant as I wait.

To You Lord, be the glory.

To You, Lord, be the glory.

To You, Lord be the glory.

Glory to You, my Lord.

Lord, be glorified.

Likely story

I broke an agreement with myself tonight.

It wasn’t me, it was Jesus.

He told me I was lovely.

And, for once, I believed Him.

He really is jealous for me.

I met a woman named Tiana.  I hope that is how she spells her name.

Poor woman.

She found out Jesus loves her tonight.

She met Him.

She met Him in me.

She couldn’t believe how much He loves her.

She didn’t want Him to love her.

She thought she was not worth His time.

She said she was not worth His money.

She didn’t see it coming.

She felt bad for Him loving her.

But He loved her, relentlessly.

That lovely woman recognized Jesus.

Thank you Lord;

You let me love like you do.

And now I hurt.



A Personal Request

My mother, who is in pain 100% of the time, who works even in the depth of her pain, who refuses medicine so as not to become dependent, will openly admit “yes, I am tough.  I am virtuous too.”

She is a virtuous woman.

She is still teaching me.  Everyday I learn from her.  When I find it hard to get out of bed early on a Saturday morning, I think of my mom.  She’d get up, I say to myself.  So I get up.  When I am in pain or extremely tired, I think to myself She’d keep going. So, I keep going.

She says that I amaze her, but really she is amazing herself.  She taught me how to be amazing.

When I find myself feeling shy and socially uncomfortable, I think of how my mom never knows a stranger, and I have confidence.

When I think that having all the responsibility I have is too much, I think of how she taught more than half of her eight children how to read…and do math

and save money

and keep organized

and laugh

and do our best

and persevere

and have confidence

and stand up for ourselves

and listen

and love Jesus.

Yes, when I fear that my children will grow apart from me in their adult years, I remember the times I grew apart from my mom.  I always knew there was nothing I could do or say to make her love me less.

There is  a saying that behind every great man is a great woman.  Well, my dad is a spectacular man, and my mother is his shining star.

My mother, who is in pain 100% of the time, who works even in the depth of her pain, who refuses medicine so as not to become dependent, needs prayer. Please pray for my mommy.





Crystal Clear Muck Raking

A common statment people say to comfort their brothers and sisters in Christ is, “God won’t give you more than you can handle, so He must think you can handle this.”  Next time you hear someone tell another that God will not give them more than they can handle, gently tell them that it is God’s business to allow us to experience more than we can handle to remind us how badly we need Him.

For goodness sake, if you say this, do a word study on suffering and see what the Spirit says to you.

What (I think) people are referring to when they say that is 1 Corinthians 10:13, “No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.”

That verse is talking about temptation, NOT circumstances.  I will talk about God’s Sovereignty in suffering and horrible circumstances some other time if the Lord allows.

However, this verse in 1 Corinthians is both comforting and annoying to me.  It is comforting because I know that no matter what situation I get myself into, or tantalizing possibilities I am presented with, God will always provide a way for me to turn it down.  Now, He doesn’t promise it will be easy or pain-free; but at least it is possible to rebuke temptation with the same authority that Jesus did when He was tempted in the desert.

It is annoying because…well, sometimes I want to sin.  Yep, I said it.  Some temptations are right up my alley. Then I hear that voice or realize the way out and I am annoyed.  Why, why can I not enjoy sinning this one time without being reminded that there is a way out and that holiness and righteousness is truly my heart’s desire?

Now, I say that flippantly and do NOT wish for the Lord to quiet His voice in my times of temptation. No, I’d rather He get louder.  I’d rather He laugh at my annoyance and rebellious flesh, and present me with greater opportunities to avoid my sin.  I think it would bring Him joy for me to choose righteousness. PLEASE DON’T LET UP, LORD! (See Romans 1, yikes!).

I imagine that when I resist the devil and flee from temptation that my flesh is wrapped around one of my legs weighing me down as I slowly walk away. As I drag myself away, I tell my flesh “Come on, get up.  I’m going whether you want me to or not.” All the while, the Lord takes his scythe and clears the path ahead of me.

It is our bodies that sin, whether it be our mind, actions, or motives. We are to present our bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to the Lord. This is our spiritual act of worship (Rom. 12:1) Yes, resisting temptation is a sacrifice and a form of worshiping.  This sacrifice is a lovely fragrance and brings Him great pleasure.


Son Bathing

Instead of wallowing in self-pity and becoming attached to hopeless wishing; instead of holding on to fear, become chained by our flesh and obsessions, why not hold on to the promise of His perfecting grace?

“So, if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed” (John 8:36).

We act as if we are on the ship of life looking through a porthole upon the sea of mercy. We sing, “If grace were and ocean we’d be sinking.” But we safely sit in our little cabin pining for that ocean of grace to drown our sorrows, fears, insecurities, pains, decisions, consequences, futures, pasts, sins; and the list goes on…


“He will turn again, he will have compassion upon us; he will subdue our iniquities; and thou wilt cast all their sins into the depths of the sea” (Micah 7:19).

“Before the throne there was what looked like a sea of glass, clear as crystal. .. (Rev. 4:6).

“Why can’t we be floating on our backs effortlessly in the sea of grace while basking in the Son?

Why associate the Lord with your sins? Why not associate God with Glory? Honor? Reverence?

The Heart of the righteous,

The only One who is Holy,

The Living Breath of  everlasting life;

My dear Jesus Christ-

I adore You.